Wednesday, May 9, 2007

lau tzu would have a spaz

There's this thing that's kinda been bugging the shit out of me that I need to address. The inanity of the phrase 'it is what it is.' Don't get me wrong. It is what it is. Technically, it can't really be anything else. If there' s a fire, or if someone ate your yogurt out of the employee fridge, hey man, what is it? Among other things, for sure it is. You'll get no arguement from me on this fundamental point. Whatever I'm saying, I'm not saying that it isn't what it is.

My issue stems from a) soul-torturing overuse and b) the people who use it. 'Wow, Mr. McZen, you're so, like deep!'

So, Gandhi-Lite, explain yourself. What exactly do you mean when you inform me that what is is what is? My take on this phrase is that by saying it, by acknowledging it, you are in fact coping with and accepting the fact that no matter how much you wish your blueberry yogurt was still in the fridge, it isn't. And that's okay, because, after all, it is what it is.

But do you usually get that? Don't the people who say that give you the impression that they're totally not accepting this simple fact of life? I think we can find a middle ground, maybe replace this formerly deep comment with something like, 'it is what it shouldn't be.' This can imply any old thing; you can beat the shit out of the yogurt eater, go home and cry while masturbating to internet porn, whatever. There's no implied reaction to your realization that 'it is what it shouldn't be.' But then, that's not so deep. Or short. You might have to make up an actual sentence to go along with this.

So, whatever. Say what you mean, don't say what you don't mean, and if you can't cope with what is, then please refrain from blithely stating the obvious. It's not going to help any of us get any better.

Which brings me to drag queens.

Let me say this: I fucking love drag queens. As a gay man in the body of a woman, technically, I myself am a drag queen. I don't love drag queens 'that way,' I simply relate in a molecular way to their desire to costume. I personally get a lot more positive attention when I'm wearing mascara. Which is why I wear it. I don't reckon it's going to raise my I.Q., but what can I do? I'm a drag queen. Which, I'll grant you, is weird.

I'd like to close with a short discussion of 'expectation' vs. 'faith.' Keep in mind that whether you're expecation or faith driven, you're still forseeing things for yourself that are good. The differentiation comes from the how of it. Expectation implies entitlement, where faith involves surrender. One, ego-driven, one, other-driven. I think, in the end, realizing you're not necessarily driving the bus at all times can help you toward what you want without falling into the trap that it's just going to happen because you're deserving. You need a lot of humility to have a little faith. My arguement is not a) that faith is God. Simply that we may all be part of something that's bigger than us, and when our hearts are open and our egos are in check, good things seem to somehow happen.

I personally have faith that I'll have Chuck Klosterman's head on a plate, but that's a subject for another day. For probably a lot of days, because I obscess about Chuck Klosterman for maybe one to two hours a day. I'll give you the full scoop if you don't know who he is.

Until then,

Your faithful chronicler


Alana B said...

I gotta disagree with your 'expectation' 'faith' thing, Gretty. Keep your heart open and your ego in check all ya want, but if Chuck Klosterman is ever going to be destroyed, we can't wait for karma. We must unite and take action...

Jege (Jen) said...

I was just bitching to Devin about how I fucking hate "it is what it is"!!! You read my mind!!!!

Kato said...

Is "it is what it is" better or worse than someone saying "It has a certain 'Je ne sais quoi'" which is simply French for "I don't know what", and an entirely retarding thing to say.

Larrin said...

FYI- CHuck Klosterman is the reason I had to cancel one of my magazine subscriptions. Who the hell keeps giving that joker a job? But alas, it is what a non-gender, indefinite thing exists.